GETTING MARRIED AT ST ANDREW'S

If you are thinking of marriage, congratulations! Wherever you choose to tie the knot, you are in our prayers. If we can help you celebrate the day, we would be privileged to do so.

Here you can find answers to some of the most common questions people have about getting married in St Andrew's. If you have more questions after reading it, please get in touch.

Is a church wedding for me?

Not everyone is sure that they want to get married in church.

I am not a Christian. Is it hypocritical to get married in church?
A church wedding will be a Christian ceremony, and you need to be comfortable with that. However, you do not have to have a convinced personal faith. We believe there is a spiritual element to any loving relationship, which a church wedding will recognise and celebrate. We will not turn you away because of things you do, or don't, believe.

I don't want a traditional wedding. Will a church service mean a day that isn't me'?
We are delighted for you to bring your own personality and ideas to the wedding. Certain parts of the Marriage Service are required by law, but organ, hymns, bells and the other traditional things are not compulsory (though we do them very nicely!). If you want to compose your own words to say, or bring your own taste in music, then we will do all we can to weave them into the church ceremony.

In the end, only you can know whether a church wedding would be the right choice. But please don't be afraid to contact us on a 'just browsing' basis. We won't be offended if, after discussion, you decide to go elsewhere!

Are there other options?

The law maintains a rigid separation between religious and civil wedding ceremonies. This means that you can't have a civil ceremony in a church building, or a Church of England wedding anywhere other than a consecrated church. In fact, you're not even allowed to say a prayer or sing a hymn in the Registry Office!

What we can offer in St Andrew's, however, is a service blessing a marriage which has taken place somewhere else. There are many reasons why you might want to consider this option: if you are getting married abroad but want to celebrate in this country as well, if you are planning to marry in a Registry Office, or if you want some recognition of the spiritual significance of your marriage but not the full 'package' of a Christian wedding.

An attraction of a Service of Blessing might be its flexibility. Because you will have completed the legalities of getting married elsewhere, your time in church can focus on what you yourself want to say about your marriage. A Service of Blessing can be anything from quiet prayers with a few friends to an all-singing, all-dancing celebration for 300. It's up to you!

Do we need to live in Whissendine?

The law decides who is allowed to be married in a particular church, not us! Current regulations are archaic, and will hopefully to be brought up-to-date in the near future. However, as things stand:

If one of you is resident in the parish of Whissendine, then you have a legal right to be married in St Andrew's. To qualify as 'resident', Whissendine must have been your main home for a minimum of 15 days before the marriage. Members of H.M. Forces serving abroad are considered to be 'resident' in their U.K. home parish.

If one of you is on the church Electoral Roll, then you can also be married here. To be on the Electoral Roll, you must be a regular worshipper at St Andrew's (i.e. at least twice a month), for a minimum period of 6 months.

If you are not resident in Whissendine nor on the church Electoral Roll, then you may still be able to get married by Special Licence. To qualify, you need to show a 'demonstrable connection' with the parish e.g. grew up here, parents live here. Special Licence applications are considered by the Archbishops' Faculty Office in Westminster.

If you or your partner is a citizen of a country other than the U.K., things can be more complicated. Please contact us for advice.

We will do all we can to enable someone who wishes to marry in St Andrew's to do so. Please get in touch to discuss the options if you are unsure about your own circumstances.

Does it matter that I am divorced?

The Church of England believes that marriage is a life-long commitment. However, it also recognises that marriages break down for many reasons. It does not seek to punish people for their mistakes, still less for the failings of others. Church of England clergy are free to follow their own consciences in choosing whether or not to marry someone who has been married before.

In most cases, we will be happy to re-marry someone who has been divorced in this church. We ask only that you are willing to have a brief, but honest, conversation about the circumstances in which your previous marriage failed. The purpose of this conversation is not to rake over the past or to intrude into your private life, but to help you think positively about what will be different in your new relationship. All conversations will be confidential and treated sensitively.

 How much does it cost?

There are two types of cost attached to a wedding in this church.

Statutory fees are set by the Church of England at national level. They cover the calling of banns (where appropriate), the vicar's time in preparing and conducting the service, and the provision of a marriage certificate. In 2006, statutory fees came to approximately £230.

Local fees cover all the 'optional extras' for your wedding. In 2006, these were:

• Organist - £50, or £100 where the service is being videoed

• Choir - £50

• Bells - £60

• Flowers (when arranged by our in-house team) -Cost of the flowers plus £50

• Heating (October – April) -£20

When you confirm the details of your wedding, we will let you know the exact amount you will need to pay.

How far in advance do we have to book?

For many weddings (especially in the popular Summer months), the reception is the thing which is difficult to book. We recognise this, and will do our best to work the date and time of the church service around you. However, the more notice you can give us, the easier it will be.

By law, a wedding ceremony cannot start before 8 a.m. and must be concluded by 6 p.m..

We are very happy for you to make a provisional booking with us, and then confirm it when the day's other arrangements have been sorted out.

How do we get things started?

The first point of contact for all enquiries is the vicar. Click here to send an e-mail.